Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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