Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize