Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Randomize
