I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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