There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
