it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Randomize
