I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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