my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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