Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize
