Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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