who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
