Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
