32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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