What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
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