I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
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