Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Randomize
