THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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