I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Randomize
