I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Randomize
