i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
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