Whod you bang
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Randomize
