I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
