What a fucking waste of an outfit
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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