just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Randomize
