chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Randomize
