Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize
