At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Randomize
