Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
