So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Randomize