I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
When are your genitals available?
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
