I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Someone shit on the floor
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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