No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
and she was petting her beer can
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
