new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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