Rock
Scissors
Fuck
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Randomize
