he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Randomize
