"it" just moved
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize
