so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
can u get pink eye on your cock?
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Damn victory sex feels great
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
