Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
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