I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Randomize
