i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
