is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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