I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
Come see our sink grown plant.
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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