Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
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