"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
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