you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
