i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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