OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Randomize
