he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Randomize
