Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
