Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
