The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
